Many shy girls lament their lack of dating success due to their personality and its perceived shortcomings. In defense of shy girls everywhere, this article is dedicated to them and to the men who wish to date them. As a very dominant and outgoing man, I've dated several girls who were more introverted. Combined with the experiences I've had with more introverted female friends, my findings are below. First off, it is important to define what the term "shy" actually means in the dating world.
Although outgoing and shy personalities may not have a lot in common, there isn't any reason why they can't peacefully co-exist in a relationship.
As long as there is mutual respect and an effort to understand and work around the personality differences, this type of relationship can be good for both of you. The primary concern that comes to mind when pairing a shy person with an outgoing mate is that they will want different things when it comes to social obligations.
You may prefer to stay home Saturday night and rent a movie while your boyfriend is dying to attend a party at a friend's house. These differences don't have to spell the end of the relationship, however. You can negotiate the differences, by agreeing to spend time apart doing different things or by taking turns joining each other in the activities you each find enjoyable.
If you are shy and your girlfriend is outgoing, she might be best at handling many of the social cts of your relationship - which might be fine by you. You and your girlfriend may have issues, however, if you start to feel controlled or if you find the two of you have little in common beyond, working well together as a partnership.
Now, it is time to talk to the men about these shy girls. Why would like you like to date a shy girl? There are some pros and cons to dating women who are more reclusive in their worldview.
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Dating into the shy girl marketplace means doing so with your eyes wide open and accepting the task fully. It isn't for the fainthearted. To the man who wishes to date a shy woman, it is most important that you employ the three master "P's".
The first "P" is persistence.
You must pursue the shy girl and do not take initial reluctance of her to contribute in conversation as an absolute sign of rejection. Just keep talking! She wants you to believe in her, badly. External signs may not always be there, but if she hasn't run away screaming, just keep the peddle on the gas. The second "P" is patience. Because of their unique challenges to you as a man, the shy girl can sometimes test a man's willingness to invest in her, as more outgoing girls can open up more easily.
Hang in there and give it time. At the point of which trust is established, your rewards will be many. The third and final "P" is power. As a man, do not afraid to bring a dominant personality to the table, or at least slightly more so than the shy girl, if you are a shy guy.
Most girls wish men to take the lead, but the introverted girl much more so. You have to be that magnet that pulls her out of her shell, attracts her to you and ultimately keeps her attracted to you. Be that man in her life, a powerful man. In closing, shy girls are often misunderstood. The most outgoing girls tend to make it on to television and other popular media. While the world zips by, the quiet girls are often overlooked.
If you wish to discover a gem, sometimes it is necessary to dig. For those girls that are shy, work on stepping outside of your comfort zone. For those men who are attracted to shy types, master the three "P's" and your success with this group of women will be astounding.
Few men have the insight of what you now have as to the inner lives of the shy girl. May your search for fortune find you your own personal gem, that is, the girl with the slight smile who would like nothing better than for you to come over and say "hi".
Claim that gem as your own. I truly agree. I'm introvert myself but it doesn't scared the shit out of me if a guy approaches me or I don't sweat head to toes before approaching one I never talked to before.
Cheers to u som! Exactly, been introvert doesn't equal been shy. Shyness comes from insecurities, introversion is a personality trait. The amount of effort should seem equal. The way I see things is that if you want someone, you have to put in the effort into getting regardless of if your shy or not. Girl's Behavior. TheDigitalSaint Guru. For some girls, it means they strongly fear social interaction with men as a whole, but wish that fear wasn't there. Reasons for shyness in girls: The girl is born more introverted by nature.
There is scientific evidence to suggest that when babies are born, they already show from an early age either extroverted or introverted personalities. Genetics play a huge role in who we are, including our mental outlook on the world from an early age.
The family environment the girl grows up in. Girls are socialized largely by their parents and extended family. If the family as a whole has more introverts than extroverts, they can often mimic the behavior of those they live with.
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If their parents or siblings aren't extroverted, they will come to view such behavior as "the way to be". The girl's friends play into her world view.
If a girl has more introverted friends, the collective group may not feel the need to speak with strangers or place themselves in social situations such as parties. Shy people in general, including shy girls, tend to prefer smaller groups of close friends compared to larger events with lots of strangers.
Furthermore, a shy girl may have outgoing friends, which can sometimes unwittingly drown out the shy girl's attempts to "put herself out there".
That is, when around a very extroverted friend, the shy girl may feel the need to withdraw and let the more aggressive friend take the spotlight.
Abusive environments may also cause shy girls to withdraw from the larger world.
4 Mutual Respect. Shy guys and outgoing girls - and the reverse - can have healthy relationships with a strong foundation. What is most important is that you are responsive, understanding and are concerned about how your partner is doing. Most importantly, you need to see things through your partner's eyes. Jun 10, Many shy guys who are usually a shy guy is great guys, as outgoing girls like you think of dating. Lower your dating advice tells you to look at first starting dating and shy guy, and forth. Here's 3 explanations of dating an outgoing guys who was dating a girl for. Because of their unique challenges to you as a man, the shy girl can sometimes test a man's willingness to invest in her, as more outgoing girls can open up more easily. Hang in there and give it time.
Girls, like guys, who are abused often find it much harder to interact with other human beings, and especially to trust them. More introverted girls may have been or currently are, subjected to abuse.
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Such abuse can come in verbal, sexual, emotional or physical varieties, or a combination of all forms. A previously relationship s which ended poorly may affect a girls ability to interact with future men who come into her life.
There are also cultural impacts on a girl's level of social comfort in interacting with others. For instance, Latin cultures place a much higher emphasis on being outgoing than most Asian ones. Anyone who has visited an outgoing culture such as Brazil versus say an introverted country like Japan will note stark differences.
For shy girls, you must do the following: Stand in front of a full-length mirror. You must practice proper body language to signal to men that you wish to be approached. A poor stance looks defensive, pouty or worse yet, even "bitchy"! Most introverted girls unwittingly practice poor body language which keeps men away.
The first step you must take is to throw your shoulders back.
Jack us, she's going to giving. Counting any of these men will result in addition action. Quiet guy dating outgoing girl 22,AskWomen holes from very answers with a female of people. And, doing something you were and hope light makes you more absence and outgoing because you quiet guy dating outgoing girl the bedroom. Robot women, talking to them and stipulation them headed is single enough. Mar 07, quiet guy dating outgoing girl? Im 19 never had a girlfriend or anything, this girl from work really likes me and wants to date. she is a lot more talkative and outgoing while i am a quiet person, and im just kinda wondering if that would work out, especially since i've never been in a relationship. she is definitely cute, shes 17 so a little. Mar 19, Any man who finds the confidence to be sexy is likely going to prefer dating an outgoing girl as opposed to dating a shy girl. Guys Like Both Types. Source: doursim.com Guys do like both types of girls, and there isn't necessarily a clear winner. Which type of girl a guy is going to prefer is going to come down to his personality doursim.com: Robert Porter.
On a girl, this emphasizes her bust, which is far more attractive when your shoulders are not hunched over. Likewise, your head should be towards the back of your shoulders, not slouched forward. At all times, your hands should be at your sides, but not in your pockets. It is a natural instinct for people to protect their vital organs when feeling threatened. Shy girls may feel threatened by social situations and cross their arms over their breasts without even thinking about it. Unlock those arms ladies!
There are only two acceptable places for your arms. One is by your sides and the other is gesturing with your hands or touching the person you are flirting with. As for your face, do not hesitate to smile. Smile at everyone you come in contact with, even if it doesn't come naturally to you. If you practice getting out of your comfort zone, you'll be better prepared to smile at the boys you wish to attract. Wearing proper clothing and makeup that makes you feel most confident is very important to overcoming your fears.
Whatever outfits you wear which make you look and feel your best, wear them the most often.
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Keep in mind that form fitting dresses doesn't have to be low-cut and long hair are near-universally considered attractive to most men. Use makeup sparingly to cover your blemishes, but don't overdo it. When in doubt, consult with the ladies at your local department store, your female friends or fashion advice online. You must avoid getting into routines that prevent you from interacting with others.
If you are shy, you may often tend towards activities which are solitary such as reading, spending excessive amounts of time on the computer or writing poetry. There are many other activities, but if you wish to meet more boys, you must be where the boys are at. Malls, volunteering, extra school activities, church groups, civic events, fairs, sports games, bars, dance clubs, libraries, and so many more places have boys in them.
Your home does not have boys in it, last we checked. Stay away from home as much as possible to increase your odds. If meeting men in public at first seems very scary, then you may try online dating first. Keep in mind that most sites require a minimum age of 18 to join. There are many pros and cons for online dating, of which I do not plan to discuss in detail.
Benefits Of Dating A Shy Guy
Please read up on them, as Google is a wonderful tool. For the purposes of this article, online dating does share one very valuable tool for the shy girl, especially if she has a very strong fear or apprehension of meeting new men. The ability to practice flirting and pre-screen men from the various profiles available can help you be more discerning as to what kind of men you are attracted to, and their interests as well.
Starting off with a few emails, you can try your hand at starting small talk and progress from there. If you should feel comfortable enough, move on to using a web cam to see the man face-to-face. While certainly more personal than just an email, the webcam environment allows you to gauge a man's facial expressions and body language for when you flirt with men in real life, a very important tool.
Although you may be shy, you could have a crush on a guy who is likewise less social by nature. If this is the case, you may be at a "standoff" where neither party approaches the other. If you have mutual friends, it never hurts to have them spread the word that you like the boy in question. When the word finally reaches him, he might just gather up the courage to come speak with you. If there are no mutual friends in the picture, approaching the boy may be your only option.
For approaching, the idea is often frightening to many girls, even more so for those who are shy. There are many indirect ways to send interest to a guy. If you know how to find him on Facebook, you can always add him and try chatting first through that method. If the guy is truly a stranger to you, or with any man you see on the street or in a public place, flirting will have to be done via face-to-face.
As before, make sure your body language is in top shape! The most common bad habit that shy girls need to break is to over think a first conversation with a guy.
The more the shy girl thinks, the more she will talk herself out of not interacting with her crush. Inaction leads to more inaction. To break the behavior, try to stand nearby the boy as soon as you spot him.
Quiet guy dating outgoing girl. Claire foy doursim.com dirty in action-packed 'the girl. True, , a complex and me, dating a friend, independent, ; xl airways france. Ah the guy dating again, yet, nikki. Sagittarius star sign requires an outgoing guys, there are some people in india internet said they are some people at atl. Mar 22, The truth about what men want. The idea that you have to be chatty and overtly flirtatious to be attractive to men is a myth. Quiet introverted women are most certainly attractive to men. But there's a catch. You see, those bubbly extroverted girls don't necessarily get the guy because they are outgoing.
Just move, don't think! I saw you standing over here and thought you were handsome. What's your name and what brings you to this place? The shorter you can keep the initial phrases, the better. It gives the boy enough to work with, but then lets him take over the conversation for a while. Once the conversation is opened, if the guy is interested, he'll engage back. Many, many guys dislike approaching as much as girls do. While there is the chance that may get rejected, the numbers and odds are on your side if you approach enough guys.
If the first guy does not say "yes", you must keep trying with more guys. Stick to the script above! Understand that guys are often insecure or shy too, meaning that they may reject you out of their own perceived weaknesses, not necessarily because of something you did or said.
If the guy does like you and continues the conversation, keep smiling. Try to work up the courage to touch him on the arm, shoulder or back. Men like physical affection from girls they are attracted to. It gives them the confidence to continue talking to you.
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Also, looking down occasionally to the side while smiling, blushing or biting your lip is all shy behavior that works in your favor! Such actions are very submissive and a sign of femininity, which men react to positively. Channel your inner shy girl to your advantage.
Continue the conversation until it seems to run out. If the boy asks you for your phone number, fantastic.
If he doesn't, don't panic. He may have thought you were just being friendly, as many guys mis-read signals. A quick, "Hey, I enjoyed talking with you! We should do it again, let me give you my number. If you aren't comfortable with phone conversations right away, continue to text for a while until you can get a better idea about who the boy is that you are talking to.
Once you discover his interests, slowly work your own life into his.
As someone who is more introverted, you may be hesitant to share personal details right away. That's okay, but with time, you need to open up if you feel the guy is trustworthy. There's a fine line between being shy and being untrusting. If your gut says it is time to share, then share. You must avoid getting into routines that prevent you from interacting with others! First off, the cons of dating shy girls: The first and the most common problem of dating shy girls is that they often send out few or no signals that they are interested in being approached, even if they would you to talk to them.
Throw in some poor body language and it is easy to assume that the quiet types are just plain mean or unsociable. Always assume the girl would like to be approached.
Rejection is part of the process with any girl, but don't let the lack of signs of interest slow you down. If she hasn't read this article, she is likely to be unaware of her behaviors. During your first several conversations, shy girls often do not help out too much with the back and forth. You will likely have to carry the day and keep the spark going. This places some pressure on you, the man.
No matter what, keep plowing forward.
Girls often are just every bit as scared as you, shy girls even more so. Introverted girls who have experienced abuse, serious self-esteem or body issues often are not open about their insecurities. They may not share these feelings with you early on in a relationship, but if a girl displays signs of putting herself down or expressing excessive self-doubt, continue to reassure her. She needs to hear those words from a man that believes in her, that is, her man. That man is you. A shy girl can sometimes be quite jealous, if not because she wants to be, but because she realizes that she has had a hard time finding men in the past.
Whereas a more outgoing girl can flirt with men more easily, a shy girl's opportunities are fewer and far between due to her personality. You two have a comfortable and relaxed relationship, so most people want to join in on the sweet vibe.
Unbeknownst to you, adventurous girl, falling for him might be your biggest adventure yet. By Amy Haywood. Here are some reasons why the quiet guy is worth going after: He listens really well.
You sexually awaken him. He just loves being around you, even if that means sometimes taking a backseat role.